Mentor’s Comments-
- Define the term ocean deoxygenation.
- List the causes of ocean deoxygenation such as climate change, eutrophication,phosphorous cycling.
- Discuss the socio-economic and environmental implications impacts of ocean deoxygenation.
- Conclude accordingly.
Id0000486418
Hello,
In intro, you have started mentioning causes too..better just define and give some stats related to it (world ocean assessment report can be used, IUCN report, ‘Ocean Deoxygenation’, can be mentioned).
Causes mentioned are fine..acidification can be mentioned as implication..unregulated effluents point has been repeated..rather you can mention about phosphorous cycling(higher phosphorous– more oxygen demand–less oxygen–promotes further phosphorous release from sediments and the cycle continues); global warming (more CO2) etc
Implications mentioned are good..however you can increase content since this is a 15 marker..disruption of ecosystem functioning, intensification of global warming, ocean acidification etc can be written.
Try to give a proper conclusion.
Keep practicing. 🙂
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Rohit
Decent attempt.
Intro is good.
Some points are repeated in the reasons..for example you have mentioned eutrophication after mentioning chemicals, nutrients etc discharge in ocean.
Phosphorous cycling can be mentioned.
Effects mentioned are good.
Conclusion is fine.
Keep practicing. 🙂
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Muskan
Intro is fine, second line can be framed better though…it is world ocean assessment report..plus mention what you are talking about is number of dead ‘zones’ in the ocean.
Causes mentioned are good, also mention phosphorous cycling..higher phosphorous– more oxygen demand–less oxygen–promotes further phosphorous release from sediments and the cycle continues.
The question is 15 marker, so you have good scope of elaborating upon points.
In implications, you can further mention..disruption of ecosystem functioning, intensification of global warming, ocean acidification, reduced access to resources for the population etc
Other points are fine, content is less with respect to 15 marks.
Conclusion is good.
Keep writing. 🙂
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Bhanu
Intro is fine, further if you mention some stats related to it (world ocean assessment report can be used, IUCN report, ‘Ocean Deoxygenation’, can be mentioned), it will be nice.
Causes mentioned are good, use of diagram is nice. However, you can elaborate some points..since it is a 15 marker, some detailing is expected. For example, in phosphorous cycling you can briefly mention the process..higher phosphorous– more oxygen demand–less oxygen–promotes further phosphorous release from sediments and the cycle continues.
Impacts are also well written, use of map again is good.
However, you can further add points like disruption of ecosystem functioning, intensification of global warming, ocean acidification, impact on health (first on marine population which then impacts human health too).
Conclusion is good.
Keep practicing. 🙂