28th June 2019 | Daily Answer Writing Enhancement

Students are advised to post answers below in the main page itself. Kindly ensure that answer to each question is posted as a separate comment with the purchase ID provided by us.

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Question 1)

What do you understand by the phenomenon of Cloud Burst? How is it related to flash floods ? Why are hilly areas more prone to the ill effects of cloud burst? (250 Words)

Question 2)

“That the Himalayan glaciers are melting rapidly is known. But what is unnerving is that the rate of their erosion has doubled in recent years. This latest revelation calls for focused strategies to tackle its causes and consequences. ” Comment. (250 Words)

Question 3)

“Originally envisaged as a temporary tool to uplift India’s most marginalised communities — Dalits and tribals — and create a level playing field, reservations slowly has become an instrument of displaying and seeking political power.” Do you agree? (250 Words)

Question 4)

An organisation consists of a variety of individuals with varying values and degrees of motivation. What challenges do leaders face when forging a harmonious work culture in such an organisation? How can leaders engender a sense of inclusion in face of such diversity? (150 Words)

 

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sourav singhVishvjeet Holkarparth vermaBandari Sravyapranab prakash Recent comment authors
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Mahesh
Member

Payment ID
MOJO9619C00D60847622

Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Mahesh
Q,1)
What is the required amount of rainfall so that the event can be considered a rain fall? Intro needs all these info. Make your intro more refined and value added.
Good points in the 1st part of the main body.
Overall the direction of your answer is good but they lack explanation. You have to explain a bit more. Use couple of statements to explain whatever you have said in single statement.
Also presentation needs to be improved.

Mark: 2

Q.2)
Always try to link the reports mentioned in the questions in your intro. Thats the better way to handle the flow of your intro.
Good 1st part.
Again you have just mentioned some points but failed to explain them. Points are decent but lack of elaboration takes the sheen out of your answer.
Read the model answers to see they have been explained on the similar points.
It will take some time but you will do better.
Good way forwards.
But conclusion is missing.

Marks: 1.5

Utkarsh Saxena
Member

q1

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Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Utkarsh
Do mention the categorisation of cloud burst: the rain from a cloudburst is usually of the shower type with a fall rate equal to or greater than 100 mm (4.94 inches) per hour. These types of info are important.
Also dam breaks, levee failure, rapid, snow melt and ice jams are also a reason for flash floods. DO mention them
Give a little more insights regarding hilly terrain and cloud burst.
2nd part of the answer has better insights, better elaborations and better depth.
Good last paragraph.
Marks: 4.5

Utkarsh Saxena
Member

q2

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Parth Verma
Admin

Good first half but while you did mentioned the consequences, but you failed to mention the causes of this speeding melting of the glaciers. It is specifically mentioned in the question. Read the questions carefully and try not to miss the important directives and keywords in the questions.
Good way forward. Nothing is there that you left out.
Work on your 1st part.

Marks: 4

Utkarsh Saxena
Member

q3

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Parth Verma
Admin

Couple of suggestions:
Do link the answer with the recent happenings like upholding of Maratha reservation in Maharashtra by the SC. Always mention in a statement how the issue is related to the recent events. ” In a significant judgment, the Bombay High Court has upheld the reservation given to the Maratha community. It has brought down the quantum of reservation from 16%, as determined by the state assembly, to 12-13%.”
Secondly, give little more feedback in the 1st part of the answer.
Lastly, give better and concrete way forwards. You have just skipped the tip of the iceberg here and just casually mentioned it.

Marks: 2

Utkarsh Saxena
Member

q4

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Parth Verma
Admin

Almost pitch perfect answer.
The only thing lacking are the examples which would have made this answer a real perfect one.
The direction of the answer is excellent and language superb.
Your usage of all the imp keywords is satisfactory. Overall quite a decent answer.

Marks: 5.5

Mohsin Khursheed
Member

Payment ID
MOJO9615J00A46183569

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Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Mohsin

Good intro.
Give a little bit of insights on the reports mentioned and their key findings.
Only climate change is mentioned in the causes of rapid melting of the glaciers. You missed imp points like rampant environmental pollution; air pollutants, such as black soot (carbon) and dust; Human activities like burning of fossil fuels, oil and gas drilling, deforestation, increasing land use in mountain regions, etc.
Rest of the answer, the content and direction are fine.
Good way forwards. For more points, read the model answer.

Marks: 3.5

Parth Ranjan
Member

Q2
MOJO9617P00D58497630

Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Parth

Decent intro.
Give a little bit of insights on the reports mentioned and their key findings.
Good use of flowcharts. Points there are good.
Overall decent answer.
Discussion and explanation are good and coverage better.
Solid way forwards.

Marks: 4.5

Parth Ranjan
Member

Q3
MOJO9617P00D58497630

Parth Verma
Admin

Do link the answer with the recent happenings like upholding of Maratha reservation in Maharashtra by the SC. Always mention in a statement how the issue is related to the recent events. ” In a significant judgment, the Bombay High Court has upheld the reservation given to the Maratha community. It has brought down the quantum of reservation from 16%, as determined by the state assembly, to 12-13%.”

The point of NGOs and foreign funding or rise of dalit parties is totally irrelevant in the reservation debate. How come reservation has bearing on political parties. Instead mention how the reservation has created a new divide specially in education and career oriented space. How the lack of agrarian income has led to the call from agrarian groups like jats or marathas or kappus asking for reservation. How the intended benefit has not percolated to the bottom and how some of the groups in SCs or OBCs have cornered maximum benefits.

Mention how reservation was envisaged as a tool for social upliftment and necessary evil in the post independence India etc.

You did not explained how the mandate of reservation has changed overtime and whether the aspects of the mandates are justified or not.
points are general in nature and such an important and relevant debate needs better points and inputs. Read the model answer please.

Marks: 2

Parth Ranjan
Member

Q4
MOJO9617P00D58497630

Parth Verma
Admin

Good 1st half of the answer though you can add points like age, gender, marital status, place of residence, etc. in the work domain.
Good that you mentioned examples of Gandhi, some social media companies etc.
Overall decent answer.
read the model answer though.

Marks: 3.5

Prakhar Bharadwaj
Member

Q1 paid

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Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Prakhar

Good couple of paragraphs
But what is flash flood? What are the interlinks between cloud bursts and flash floods.
Points like lack of adequate connectivity or poorly trained and understaffed DM personnel are not the reason for cloud bursts in Hilly areas. Instead they are the consequences or poor after-event-strategy related issues.
Dont give general statements like these. Instead keep the focus on the discussion as in why the hilly areas suffer most of the cloud bursts.
Good way forward and conclusion.

Marks: 2

Prakhar Bharadwaj
Member

Q2

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Parth Verma
Admin

Good intro.
Give a little bit of insights on the reports mentioned and their key findings.
Rest of the answer is fine and approached in a decent manner.
Points are solid and explanation short yet firm
Good attempt.

Marks: 5

Prakhar Bharadwaj
Member

Q3

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Parth Verma
Admin

First if all, do mention the relevant article numbers like:
Advancement of Scheduled Castes (SC) and the Scheduled Tribes (ST) OR any socially and educationally backward classes of citizens (Eg: OBC) OR economically weaker sections (EWS) – Article 15 (4), Article 15 (5), and Article 15 (6),
Adequate representation of any backward class of citizens OR economically weaker sections (EWS) in the services under the State. – Article 16 (4) and Article 16 (6)

Your point regarding 10 year clause of reservation only implies for the legislatures and not overall reservation. Try to differentiate it in your answer.
What is your support arguments for reservation? Its missing in the answer.

Good 2nd part of your answer.
Language of the answer, throughout, has been amazing and flow was quite excellent. Work on your content a bit and keep better focus on the balance of your reservation debate.

Marks: 3

Prakhar Bharadwaj
Member

Q4

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Parth Verma
Admin

Good answer.
Examples are apt and to the point.
Content ok.
For more inputs, you can read model answer.
All in all, good answer.

Marks: 4.5

Kunal Aggarwal
Member

Q1

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Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Kunal

Very good answer,
You covered almost all the dimensions of question.
Explanation is excellent without being too technical.
Way forwards are well covered.
Apt use of diagram
Marks: 6

Kunal Aggarwal
Member

Q2

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Parth Verma
Admin

Good intro.
Give a little bit of insights on the reports mentioned and their key findings.
Your coverage of the 1st part, regarding the consequences of the melting of glacier, is lengthy and the balance is disproportional in terms of equal weight of both parts.
Points in both the parts are well covered and almost all the aspects are covered in fine manner
Solid way forwards between the discussions.

Marks: 5

Kunal Aggarwal
Member

Q3

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Parth Verma
Admin

Do link the intro of the answer with the recent happenings like upholding of Maratha reservation in Maharashtra by the SC. Always mention in a statement how the issue is related to the recent events. ” In a significant judgment, the Bombay High Court has upheld the reservation given to the Maratha community. It has brought down the quantum of reservation from 16%, as determined by the state assembly, to 12-13%.”

Also do mention some of the relevant constitutional provisions like:
Advancement of Scheduled Castes (SC) and the Scheduled Tribes (ST) OR any socially and educationally backward classes of citizens (Eg: OBC) OR economically weaker sections (EWS) – Article 15 (4), Article 15 (5), and Article 15 (6),
or
Adequate representation of any backward class of citizens OR economically weaker sections (EWS) in the services under the State. – Article 16 (4) and Article 16 (6)

Rest of the discussion is good. The content or the discussion is amazing and your command on the language is superb. Its good to read your answers and most of the times they do not disappoint.

Marks: 4

Kunal Aggarwal
Member

Q4

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Parth Verma
Admin

All in all pitch perfect answer.
The only thing lacking are the real life r hypothetical examples which would have made this answer a real perfect one.
The direction of the answer is excellent and language superb.
Your usage of all the imp keywords is satisfactory.

Marks: 5.5

noira khan
Member

payment ID MOJO9614D0056022707

Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Noira
Good intro.
Give a little bit of insights on the reports mentioned and their key findings.
Rest of the answer is well attempted.
All the dimensions are covered and coverage is wide and deep.
As always with your answers, its a decent attempt.

Marks: 5.5

noira khan
Member

paymentID MOJO9614D0056022707

Parth Verma
Admin

There are couple of issues with the answer

First, do link the intro of the answer with the recent happenings like upholding of Maratha reservation in Maharashtra by the SC. Always mention in a statement how the issue is related to the recent events. ” In a significant judgment, the Bombay High Court has upheld the reservation given to the Maratha community. It has brought down the quantum of reservation from 16%, as determined by the state assembly, to 12-13%.”

Also do mention some of the relevant constitutional provisions like:
Advancement of Scheduled Castes (SC) and the Scheduled Tribes (ST) OR any socially and educationally backward classes of citizens (Eg: OBC) OR economically weaker sections (EWS) – Article 15 (4), Article 15 (5), and Article 15 (6),
or
Adequate representation of any backward class of citizens OR economically weaker sections (EWS) in the services under the State. – Article 16 (4) and Article 16 (6)
This is just an example and you can use language and content according to your own comfort.

the discussion regarding reservation debate is not so much about its pros and cons but regarding the changing composition and demands of reservation. Instead it should have been mostly about arguments for and against reservation and how it has led to this position.

Rather than keeping the way forward portion as a conclusion, you should approach this segment separately and give couple of suggestions regarding what should be done.

Read the model answer in this regard.

Language of the answer is really good.

Marks: 3

RAVI VERMA
Guest

Thank You.

pranab prakash
Member

Payment ID MOJO9611300N14575632
Q1

Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Pranab
Give a little bit of insights on the reports mentioned and their key findings.
Good and exhaustive points in the 1st part of the answer. Keep it up.
Rather than discussing the importance of glaciers, discuss what will be the consequences of the melting of glaciers.
Good way forwards.
Overall language is decent. Presentation is also solid.

Marks: 3.5

pranab prakash
Member

Payment ID MOJO9611300N14575632
Q2

Parth Verma
Admin

Very good answer
All the concepts are well explained and all the dynamics have been covered in decent manner.
Language and flow of the answer is superb.
The only suggestion I would give is to shorten the length of your paragraphs (Sometimes they become to bulky. Avoid it.) and use diagrams in answers.
All in all, very good answer.

Marks: 6

pranab prakash
Member

Payment ID MOJO9611300N14575632
Q3

Parth Verma
Admin

Discussion is good.
The debate has been captured in apt manner.
The content or the discussion is amazing and your command on the language is superb. Nothing to pinpoint in the answer.

Marks: 6

Bandari Sravya
Member

MOJO9616700A12539386
Q2

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Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Sravya
If you using flash while taking pics of your answers, then avoid it because it makes the answer unreadable. Use camscanner app for better picture quality.
Content is ok.
Good use of diagram.
For more inputs, you can read model answer.
All in all, good answer.
Work on your presentation skills.

Marks: 4

Bandari Sravya
Member

MOJO9616700A12539386
Q2 answer

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Parth Verma
Admin

Half of the answer in each page is unreadable due to the reflection of the flash. Please avoid it.
In the intro, do mention the report and after the intro, briefly discuss the key findings of the report.
Only climate change and plastic waste are mentioned in the causes of rapid melting of the glaciers. You missed imp points like rampant environmental pollution; air pollutants, such as black soot (carbon) and dust; Human activities like burning of fossil fuels, oil and gas drilling, deforestation, increasing land use in mountain regions, etc.
Picture quality in the 2nd page is not so good either. Its quite difficult to read.
But whatsoever i was able to make out of it, the discussion was good in the 2nd part of the answer and points were exhaustive.

Marks: 3

Bandari Sravya
Member

MOJO9616700A12539386
Q3

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Parth Verma
Admin

Do link the intro of the answer with the recent happenings like upholding of Maratha reservation in Maharashtra by the SC. Always mention in a statement how the issue is related to the recent events. ” In a significant judgment, the Bombay High Court has upheld the reservation given to the Maratha community. It has brought down the quantum of reservation from 16%, as determined by the state assembly, to 12-13%.”

Also do mention some of the relevant constitutional provisions like:
Advancement of Scheduled Castes (SC) and the Scheduled Tribes (ST) OR any socially and educationally backward classes of citizens (Eg: OBC) OR economically weaker sections (EWS) – Article 15 (4), Article 15 (5), and Article 15 (6),
or
Adequate representation of any backward class of citizens OR economically weaker sections (EWS) in the services under the State. – Article 16 (4) and Article 16 (6)

In the debate of the reservation, you were not asked whether reservation is good or bad. No. You were asked to debate about the changing nature of the reservation and how and why other communities have started asking for it in various parts of the nation.

Answer ends abruptly without discussing what is the way forward to the raging issue. You have uploaded same page twice.

Marks: 2.5

Bandari Sravya
Member

MOJO9616700A12539386
Q4

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Parth Verma
Admin

The direction of the answer is excellent and language superb.
Work on your presentation skills though.
Structure of the answer is solid too.
Overall decent attempt.
Keep writing.

Marks: 4.5

sourav singh
Member
Parth Verma
Admin

Hi Sourav,
Please upload your answers on this page to get it reviewed.
Thanks

Vishvjeet Holkar
Member

Log in with facebook account…..when i logged in with Google account ,option to attach file was not visible….but with facebook it was……

sourav singh
Member

thanks bro
your efforts are highly appreciated.